The afternoon Dad and I returned home from Mom's simple ashes-sprinkling ceremony by her cemetery marker, in accordance with her will, attended by a few relatives and close friends, I was numbed out. I wasn't surprised to see Dad get out a beer and make himself a thick roast beef sandwich; at 350 lb. that was just his way of coping. He asked me if I was hungry, which I wasn't, but I took the beer he slid across the table. Neither one of us was crying or even especially sad; I think we were both just relieved that it was over, both speechless. I drank another beer, watching Dad finish off a huge bowl of vanilla ice cream drenched in chocolate syrup. He let out an enormous belch, went to the living room, lit up a cigar and started watching a football game. Normally I'd leave him alone at that point, but this time I really needed his company, so I sat down next to him. He put his arm across my shoulders, something he'd done occasionally and briefly before, but this time he didn't take. ‘I can’t believe I just fucked this up.’ Adam said to himself. Adam thought about how he vowed celibacy until he met the right one. Corey was the right one for him, he just knew it. What bothered him the most was that he had hinted many times to Corey that he was going to make his birthday a night to remember. Here he was deep cleaning his hole of all the gardner’s cum. ‘Why did it have to be the gardner? How low can this get?’ Adam said. But then Adam rethought his statement. There was something about Kyle that made him different from everyone else. He thought about the guys at school he flirted with over the years and none of them compared to him, Kyle actually made him feel vulnerable and submissive. Adam was more of the one in charge as other past boyfriends had revealed to him. Adam couldn’t believe he was thinking about this guy like this…… Kyle sat on his bed watching videos and looking at raunchy photos of his past tricks, Sam, Donnie, Keith, Derek, Martin, Tyrell, and.
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